Encountering Rothko

[Verse 1]

It's time for the mind wipe

One of my biggest fears is that I'll never feel love in this lifetime

Hungry for a feeling that I only ever see from the sidelines

It's an answer that I long to know

And what I've learnt is

It's different when you're in it like you're swimmin' with the fishes

Immersed in it

But now I'm lookin' back, I think I was just gazin' down on the surface

To somewhere that I cannot go

[Chorus]

I'm standing in front of the Rothko

They say that it makes people cry

I've been here for hours

But God knows why

[Verse 2]

I could never get close enough

I see the words spoken move through you, and in that moment

I think that I know love

Pressed against the glass, the colours bleedin'

And I'm feelin' your blood hum

Or maybe I just badly want to

It's in the ether

How I ever felt about you, and I used to be such a believer

I find myself bleeding

And it seems that it's never even for the right reasons

And what those are I still haven't a clue

[Chorus]

I'm standing in front of the Rothko

They say that it makes people cry

I've been here for hours

But God knows why

[Verse 3}

And I want so badly to love you

And be sure of feeling that way

And in what I'm saying there's some truth

But not enough for me to stay

I'm standing in front of the Rothko

They say that it makes people cry

I've been here for hours

But God knows, God knows why

[Outro]

(I want to love, I want to love you) And I want so badly to love you

And be sure of feeling that way (I want to love)

(I want to love you) And in what I'm saying there's some truth

But not enough for me to stay

from Google AI:

The relationship between Paris Paloma's artwork-inspired tracks—"Pre-Raphaelite," "Rothko," and "I Cry in Front of Paintings"—is rooted in her former life as a visual painter, exploring themes of self-discovery, emotional numbness, the female gaze, and the realization of how we process love and art. [1, 2, 3]

Key Connections and Songs

Pre-Raphaelite (The Female Gaze and Adoration): This track serves as a love letter to the female gaze, celebrating non-sexual, deep appreciation for women’s unique features, flaws, and character—inspired by the historic Pre-Raphaelite artist muses (like Elizabeth Siddal and Jane Morris). It captures how we idolize, admire, and occasionally feel a twinge of envy toward women we find "achingly cool". [1, 2, 3]
Rothko & I Cry in Front of Paintings (Sister Songs of Emotional Epiphany): These two tracks are deeply linked narrative bookends on her album The Fatal Flaw. They stem from a core memory shared by Paloma:
• At age 17, she stood in front of a Mark Rothko painting, feeling broken or inadequate because she couldn't cry in front of it the way others did.
• At age 23, she stood in front of a lover and similarly felt incapable of loving them the way she thought she was supposed to.
• "Rothko" and "I Cry in Front of Paintings" map this journey from self-blame, emotional blockage, and the fear of being incapable of feeling, to the final relief of understanding—realizing that love and emotional resonance arrive on their own timeline when you are finally ready and able to accept them. [1, 2, 3, 4]

The Thread Between Art and Identity

Visual Background: Paloma trained and worked as a painter before shifting into music, using fine art, historical movements, and painters as emotional mirrors.
From Awe to Acceptance: "Pre-Raphaelite" explores how we look at people like living art, while "Rothko" and "I Cry in Front of Paintings" use the literal canvas as a metaphor for unlocking buried vulnerability, turning art appreciation into a metaphor for learning how to love.